The past month has been a hard one 'round these parts. Triple ear infection (3x, not that Chloe has 3 ears:), and some long sleepless nights that lead to sleep deprivation close to newborn days. Actually, one of my biggest fears since having Chloe is that I would be in THAT place again. Sleep deprivation. It has been such a fear that sometimes I sleep even when I am not tired because I am afraid that I won't get that sleep down the line. It sounds nuts writing it, but somehow I associated my post-partum depression/baby blues with my lack of sleep. Now after some of those long nights, a few only getting a couple of hours at a time, I don't think it was just sleep. I know it wasn't just sleep that was nearly pushing me over the edge. HORMONES, C-SECTION, MASTITIS. I am still and will probably always be someone who functions best on 9 hours a night. It annoys me. But I have come to realize I will not die or become unstable with a few nights without that. I can embrace that sleepless nights are usually a season and there will be a full nights sleep again. I have a very patient husband that reminds me of these thing when I am feeling afraid that things will never get better. They do, they really do. I need a giant sign written on every wall in my home that I can see on hard days: It won't always be like this! Thank you Jesus, for new days, for life circumstances to trust you in, for sleep when we can get it. Things are getting better, ears are clear, and more nights of sleep. Ahh....
11 months. Chloe is having a great time enjoying the summer weather. She loves being outside and likes being in the grass, but crawls with knees off of the ground (hands and feet only). She loves spending time with her Daddy in the morning and just jabbers and plays while I get a bit more rest. Friday we were passing by a neighbors garage sale and they had a playpen that we decided for $5 was worth a try. She spent some time in there today and seemed to enjoy it, especially the throwing things out part. She is standing by herself more and more, but hasn't figured out how to move her feet. She is taking two pacifiers to bed with her and likes to hold one and have one in her mouth. Cute now, I am anticipating the day we take those away it will not be cute at all. This really is a fun stage. Chloe is such a social baby and it is so great to see her interacting with others. That smile just melts my heart. I am planning her 1st birthday party and can't wait.
